Preparing Jeremy for the new arrival ......

Explaining to a three year old that mummy is having a baby even in the simplest terms is no easy task. However, he is beginning to sense changes taking place due to the arrival of the newest member in the family. For example, he asked why mummy can't carry him anymore and how he has to now rely more on daddy for that. Why I need to buy new baby pillows and etc... I have even asked him to share his toys with the baby but he refuses and promptly ask me to keep them when the topic of sharing toys with his sibling came up. To help Jeremy ease into his role as a big brother and accept a younger sibling for company and support, I have sought out several books for myself and him to read. I thought I could also share this with the many mommies who are also eagerly anticipating their 2nd or 3rd bambinos in the Year of the Ox.

The Everything Parent's Guide To Raising Siblings: Tips to Eliminate Rivalry, Avoid Favoritism, And Keep the Peace

I found this book by chance in MPH while I was browsing through some books on baby names. I must confess that I haven't finished reading the book but I admit that it is full of helpful tips on how to build a strong lasting sibling relationship whereby they can turn to each other for help or support in times of need. As you know what they say ... blood is always thicker than water. Also, it gave some helpful hints for parents on how to manage and balance the delicate relationship with the arrival of a younger sibling who could be seen to be competing directly with the older child for the parents' affections and attention. The last thing we need is to provoke jealousy and sibling rivalry in Jeremy. No doubt the younger sibling will demand quite fair bit of attention from the adults given the physical needs of an infant and toddler in the initial years and who could not even do 90% of what his/her older and more independent brother can do. However, based on the recommendations provided in the book, Brain and I will need to consciously involve him as well in the process of caring for the younger sibling. For eg, he will also now carry on the role of mommy's little helper like fetching the diapers and etc for the baby as well as playing and interacting with the baby. This is not only to make him feel important but rather we hope that such actions will help him to bond with the newcomer. Additionally, other adults who come to see, visit, care or play with the baby such as grandparents and aunts/uncles would also need to do their part in ensuring that Jeremy doesn't feel left out. They would need to consciously greet and interact with him first before tending to the younger child. In a way, we are helping or demonstrating to Jeremy that we are not playing favourites and that he is treated equally to his younger sibling. This is not an easy task especially when we parents will always have to keep working on this even until they reach adulthood. Sure, there will be bickering, shouting, door slamming, accusations thrown at each other, tantrums, tears and etc as they grow older. But at the end of the day, we hope that despite all these, the two siblings will learn to love, respect and support each other as no man is an island.

What to Expect When Mummy's Having A Baby by Heidi Murkoff

I found this book at Kinokuniya, KLCC when we were both browsing for books in the children's section. The illustrations and explanations were simple enough for Jeremy to understand .... or so I thought. The entire book is narrated by Angus the dog and I felt it was a bit too descriptive as it essentially explained the entire process including the part of about the birds and bees. Fancy trying to explain what an ovum is to a three year old or even a seven year old for that matter!.... I felt that part was unnecessary so I would usually skip that particular page when I read it to Jeremy. Unfortunately, he doesn't seem to be very much interested in the book or the pictures and found my reading terribly boring... Till today, he doens't really seek out that particular book for me to read. He is happy for me to read to him, books by Roger Hargreaves or even Richard Scarry but not this one. So it is back to Mr Greedy, Mr Tall, Mr Bounce and the whole Mr Men Gang for now.

Well he does know one little fact now though - that mommy's ballooning tummy is due to the fact that there is a baby inside there now...